GayWeddings.com

I'm looking for a good checklist for a wedding that I am coordinating. Since this is the first gay ceremony that I am coordinating, I would like to make sure I don't miss anything. Does anyone have a list they would be willing to share?

Thanks in advance!
Jen

Are you looking for elements that are specific to gay weddings, or are you looking for a checklist for weddings in general? Are you experienced at coordinating straight weddings?

There are 2 or 3 books that have checklists specifically for gay and lesbian weddings, Planning Gay and Lesbian Weddings, is one of them. We also used many of the same checklist from all the traditional (straight) wedding books. I found that in planning my partners and my wedding that we are following many traditional checklists.

quote:

Originally posted by JH:
I'm looking for a good checklist for a wedding that I am coordinating. Since this is the first gay ceremony that I am coordinating, I would like to make sure I don't miss anything. Does anyone have a list they would be willing to share?

Thanks in advance!
Jen

Hi, Jen,

My wife and I pretty exclusively worked from theknot.com 's quite extensive checklists when we were planning our wedding. There really weren't any changes specific to it being a gay wedding, other than having to multiply some of the bride items by two (get two dresses, not just one) and remove some of the groom items (do not rent tux for groom). It was pretty obvious and not too challenging.

If you're an officiant, and you're talking about coordinating the actual wedding ceremony, then that'll make more of a difference. In that case, you'll probably want to work through the ceremony with the particular couple to work out what adjustments to the usual ceremony structure they want to make.

Oooh, one more thing. The actual wedding day schedule might need to be tweaked a bit to allow for two brides rather than one, particularly if they want to get ready separately, and if they both want hair and makeup professionally done. Primping just takes longer for a bride than it does for a groom... so just build in extra time for the getting ready part.

quote:

Originally posted by atlantabride2231:
There are 2 or 3 books that have checklists specifically for gay and lesbian weddings, Planning Gay and Lesbian Weddings, is one of them. We also used many of the same checklist from all the traditional (straight) wedding books. I found that in planning my partners and my wedding that we are following many traditional checklists.

I am not able to find the book titled "Planning Gay and Lesbian Weddings." I searched on Amazon, etc. I am planning a wedding for my partner and I. I am looking for good planning books and checklists. Would you be able to help me?

Thank you!!!

I agree with Countess. www.theknot.com is a great site- J and I have worked almost exclusively by their checklist, which only needs minor tweaking for two grooms or two brides. You can also search for gay and lesbian weddings that are profiled on the site- great for inspiration. We're also using the online guest-list manager, budgeter, and personal webpage to provide further information (like our registries and hotel info) to our guests. It's free. Sorry to sound like such a lemming, but I do find that site incredibly useful.
For books, you might try "Gay and Lesbian Weddings" by David Toussaint. If you're on a budget or even if you're not, "Bridal Bargains" by Denise and Alan Fields is great- it's obviously written toward brides, but the info is useful for two grooms, too. It's especially good for keeping yourself from getting scammed (a popular activity in the wedding industry, it seems) and knowing ahead how to talk to your vendors. Good luck!

quote:

Originally posted by Countess:
Oooh, one more thing. The actual wedding day schedule might need to be tweaked a bit to allow for two brides rather than one, particularly if they want to get ready separately, and if they both want hair and makeup professionally done. Primping just takes longer for a bride than it does for a groom... so just build in extra time for the getting ready part.

Also - more time so that each bride can be photographed as she gets ready. We just realized that we needed to schedule in the two sessions of getting ready with our photographer, luckily she's experience with this!

quote:

Originally posted by JH:
I'm looking for a good checklist for a wedding that I am coordinating. Since this is the first gay ceremony that I am coordinating, I would like to make sure I don't miss anything. Does anyone have a list they would be willing to share?

Jen

Not to reiterate what everyone else is saying - but we used standard lists from a few wedding magazines and I also LOVED "The anti-brides guide". It had great "how to's" as well as good ideas about alternative ways of doing things (how to write out the invites for two bride's parents, for example...)