GayWeddings.com

My partner an I have been together for almost three years and we think it is time for the next step in our relationship. Any suggestions asa to who gets to wear the engagment ring or do we both wear one.

Hi Jaime!

Congrats on being ready to take the next step! It's very exciting news!

I've heard of couples who get matching bands and wear them as engagement rings; couples who give each other different rings; couples who follow a more traditional route where one partner wears an engagement ring.

One of the nice things (and occasionally difficult things!) about gay wedding tradition is that there aren't too many rules binding you.

I think that you and your partner should do what feels right. If one of you isn't proposing to the other, then perhaps you might together pick out an engagement ring / commitment band set (the latter part to be exchanged during your ceremony, of course!).

Have you two talked about this? What are you leaning toward?

my partner and I have decided to both wear engagement rings. It is my first wedding and her second. So she wants me to experience everything when it comes to getting married.

quote:

Originally posted by Jaime:
my partner and I have decided to both wear engagement rings. It is my first wedding and her second. So she wants me to experience everything when it comes to getting married.

Good plan! My wife and I both wore engagement rings during our engagement, and we wear them in sets with our wedding bands now.

If it's a surprise proposal, then the proposee can go out and get the proposer a ring afterwards, as well... there are no hard and fast rules, and the surprise proposal with ring already picked out is getting less rare anyway.

She proposed to me with a gorgeous antique diamond ring she picked out, then I picked her ring for her. We really trust each others' taste in jewellery. I think getting some input from the other person is probably a good idea so you get a ring that suits them, if they'll be wearing it every day.

I got the most amazing engagement ring. It had Our names engraved inside with our engagement date. It was from Limogues.com they are an amazing site I love them. Plus it makes it VERY personal and real!

Congratulations!
Nikki

J and I both wear engagement rings. We were initially going to have different rings, but it tuned out that I loved the ring I bought for her (tee-hee) so she got the same one for me a few weeks later. The jeweller has been great and he's designing wedding bands to fit the engagement rings.
One thing about the engagment ring I didn't realize before wearing one, though, is how much more "out" it can make one become! I was out to all my friends and family before, but suddenly strangers were asking about my ring all the time! I seem to find myself coming out to a stranger (usually by correcting them when they assume something about "the groom") once every week or two now. That's a-ok with me, but it has been difficult with clients. As an outreach worker, I don't talk about my life much with clients, but I don't lie when they ask me something, so there have been a few difficult conversations there- usually because I'm trying to find some way to answer their question without using pronouns. I don't want any homophobia interfering with my work with clients, so I do my best to fend off questions about the ring, which come up a lot. So far, it's only been once that I've been backed into a conversational corner and had to just come out to a client. So, I hate that balancing act, but I love my ring and I refuse to take it off, so it's just something to think about when you're deciding about rings- life may become a little more of an open book than usual once you've got a diamond on!

Oh I am so happy to see a topic on rings.

Lyly and I are both on a rather tight budget so we are not going to wear expensive rings. We are going to Paris in a few weeks and I hope we can find our rings together there as I decided not to buy a ring without her as I wanted her to have one she will love and be proud of.

My partner and I both have engagement rings. She brought mine first and then I brought hers. We are both going together to get our wedding bands.

Both shell and I have rings. I bought hers first as I had been planning on proposing. She gave me mine a few months after that. They are both unique diamond rings, but they fit each one of us perfectly. Our wedding bands are very different. Mine has diamonds in it while hers is just a plain band (for now)!