GayWeddings.com

Hello!

My partner and I were married on 10/27/06 and instead of using a traditional officiant, we asked one of our close friends to officate our ceremony. Because gay marriage is not yet legal in our home state (AZ), our friend did not have to be licensed or credentialed in any way. (She just happens to be an FBI agent, which is sort of ironic in it's own way, but that's another topic!) Having someone we knew on a personal basis meant so much more to us than having a stranger perform such a sacred role in our big day.

I'd like to know what everyone thinks about the idea of friends or family officiating their wedding ceremony. Would you do it? Why or why not?

Thanks and I look forward to lots of fun discussions with all of you!

Carey Powell
Fearless Soul Life Coaching
www.fearlesscoaching.net

This message has been edited. Last edited by: Kathryn,

Carey-

Welcome to the CommUNIONity forums! We're pleased to have you introducing discussions and responding to other threads and sharing your professional and personal perspective.

I'm especially interested in this thread! My partner and I also had a dear friend officiate our ceremony and she did a TREMENDOUS job. Of course, she's an experienced educator and has a committed spiritual practice and both made a difference in her role in the day.

One of the things I love most about her: every year on the day of our anniversary, she calls us to remind us of our guiding principle as a couple. She says -- no more, no less:

"Hi, Kathryn & Amy, it's Renee. I'm calling to remind you that the purpose of your Union is for loving and serving each other and taking responsibility for putting the other person first."

What a gift to have found such a special person to help us celebrate our commitment to each other and, in a way, renew our vows every Labor Day Weekend!

If you are going to have a friend do your ceremony, make sure they are good at public speaking, poised and happy to do it. This sounds very obvious, but there are many officiants who aren't really good at it, and such an important event should be created well.

If you have friends who would love to be part of the ceremony, but not necessarily do the entire thing, maybe have them be part of a ritual like a handfasting. It's a beautiful way to incorporate them without undue pressure.